The Long Night (in): The Battle of the Best Pizza Sides

The epic battle you’ve all been waiting for is upon us! That’s right, we’re talking about the battle of the pizza sides!

Firstly, let’s clarify something: people have *very* strong opinions about the best sides to have with pizza. It’s not quite Game of Thrones level, but it’s certainly a decision that can prompt heated discussions. See what happens when you only get bread sticks…

And if you dare not order any sides at all for the office pizza party…well, let’s just say you shouldn’t do that.

So what are we going to do here? Well, we are going to analyse some of our favourite Papa John’s pizza side dishes and figure out our top five favourites based on a very scientific formula. The formula takes into account a detailed algorithm that considers how sides perform in excitement rating, shareability, gluttony factor and originality.

OK it’s not scientific. Shush.

5. Garlic Pizza Sticks

Coming in at number 5 are the old faithful friend of a pizza take-away – the garlic pizza sticks! Some people love them; others say they’re just like pizza but not quite as good! Haters…

Whatever your opinion of them, they’re a hugely popular item and are definitely here to stay.

Excitement Rating: 2/5

Shareability: 4/5

Gluttony Factor: 3/5

Originality: 1/5

Total: 10/20

4. Jalapeno & Cheese Crinkle Wedges

Switching gears at number 4 is the hugely exciting but equally moreish jalapeno and cheese wedges. As far as pizza sides go, if it has cheese, it’s a hit. If it has jalapenos as well, it’s a true smash! This side ads the heat to your pizza warm-up game and, in truth, it could be higher up if not for the utter quality of the entrants ahead of it!

Excitement Rating: 5/5

Shareability: 2/5

Gluttony Factor: 4/5

Originality: 2/5

Total: 13/20

3. Chicken Poppers (Tandoori, Piri Piri & Original!)

An Italian friend once (wrongly) told me it’s sacrilege to put chicken on a pizza. While he clearly knows nothing of the origins of pizza, one perfect cluckin’ solution if faced with this scenario is to order a non-chicken pizza and get your chicken fix on the side! Luckily at Papa John’s we have a number of chicken side options including three distinct flavours of Chicken Poppers! The PiriPiri Poppers have a real kick and all three are as dippable as any side dish on the menu – so be sure to order sauces!

Excitement Rating: 3/5

Shareability: 5/5

Gluttony Factor: 3/5

Originality: 4/5

Total: 15/20

2. Marmite® Cheese Scrolls (Vegan Options Available!)

What can we say about the Marmite® Cheese Scrolls that hasn’t already been said? Well, we expected social media to be divided, but actually you ALL LOVED THEM! OMG!

These are so addictive they almost steal the show from the actual pizza at times. If you haven’t tried them yet, make sure to add them to your next order!

Excitement Rating: 4/5

Shareability: 4/5

Gluttony Factor: 4/5

Originality: 5/5

Total: 17/20

And the number one pizza side is…Drum roll please…

1. Chicken Wings Obviously!!!

As wonderful as a main course as they are as a side, the clear winner here is the humble yet eternally loved chicken wing. We have a sweet and sticky BBQ wing option along with our roasted wings, but the star of the show surely is the buffalo wings.

Excitement Rating: 5/5

Shareability: 5/5

Gluttony Factor: 5/5

Originality: 3/5

Total: 18/20

So there you have it. A scientific and not-at-all-biased review of the greatest pizza sides of them all!

Get involved on social media. Let us know your favourite sides or tell us if you disagree with any of the positions on our list using #PizzaPals!